I am sure you have all heard of the poem by John Doone “No Man is an Island”. The meaning behind this famous piece of literature is that no one is self-sufficient; everyone relies on others.
Although I find it very hard to rely on others for anything, I try to stay mindful that I can’t do it all alone. What does doing it all myself get me anyway? I feel rushed because I do not have enough time, stressed because I feel rushed, and resentful of others (mostly my husband). I am trying to hold on to control that I never really had in the first place.
Lately, I have been discussing with my clients the difference between taking and receiving. Taking is grabbing hold of something; receiving, on the other hand, is accepting something that is being given to you. I feel it is important to really see the difference. I, myself, never want to be a taker. However, I am working on receiving help from others. My husband has been helping me realize that things like taking the trash out or putting away laundry is not something that needs to add stress to my life. So I work on saying, “Can you please do it?”It is o.k. to ask for help.
I’m learning to let others in and delegate, so I can be free for just one moment of the responsibility, reminding myself in those moments that no one person can do it all. And… that is o.k.
Perhaps your are having trouble at work, suffering with an addiction, or drowning in motherhood. I encourage you to reach out, get connected, and ask for what you need. You are not expected to do it all alone.
Natalie Nesbitt, MS, LPC, NCC loves working with couples! Helping them find the passion in their relationship; remove blocks that are keeping them from being their best; learning to have a marriage they have only dreamed. Providing personalized couples therapy and life counseling at her private psychotherapy practice in Paoli, Pennsylvania, conveniently located on the Main Line. She has helped countless couples save their marriages and/or relationships and come back from the deepest of betrayals.